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Psychological Abuse
What is it?
Without broken bones or bruises, proving psychological & narcissistic abuse is beyond challenging. Narcissistic abuse falls under emotional and psychological abuse, yet those terms do not convey the malignancy and impact of narcissistic abuse. Understanding the very specific phases and the correlating symptoms of narcissistic abuse provides what can be considered a recognizable and applicable template. Essentially, narcissistic abuse can be defined by the the abuser's tactics and behaviors, and the resulting symptoms whichmost victims experience.
"The famous scholar of the Islamic Golden Age, Ibn Sina once conducted a medical experiment. He put two identical lambs in two separate cages, and he placed a wolf in one of the side cages. The wolf could only be seen by ONE of the lambs and the other was placed out of sight.
Months after, the lamb who could see the wolf died out of sheer stress and fear, even though the wolf did not physically go near or even threaten the lamb. The other lamb that had not seen the wolf lived on healthily and in good spirits.
This experiment showed the power and effects of mental influence on our health and body. Fear, anxiety, stress and negativity does nothing but harm — even if we don’t realise the damage it is doing to us internally."
Why Psychological Abuse is Dangerous
It is widely confirmed that those who have not experienced narcissistic abuse cannot understand the horrifically destructive mental, physical, and financial effects which chronically plague traumatized victims, leaving them isolated, despondent, and fearful when seeking help, support, and safety from friends, family, therapists, doctors, and law enforcement.
Methodically, the narcissist performs a series of malevolent acts which slowly cause the victim to question their own sanity. The eventual deterioration of the victim's mind, esteem, health, reputation, credibility, and finances leave them weak and vulnerable, unable to defend themselves against the abuser's ultimate goal:
Avoid exposure at all costs
The fear of exposure is such a severe threat to their existence that a narcissistic will discreetly execute a plot, often with the assistance of family and friends, to discredit, discard, and destroy the victim before they can save themself.
Physical Adverse Effects
Suicide
Suicidal Ideation
PTSD and/or CPTSD
Autoimmune Disease
Emotional Disregualtion
Paranoia, Fear, & Isolation
Depression, Anxiety, Confusion
Mind Looping & Insomnia
Nightmares & Night Sweats
Stomach aches & GI Concerns
Difficulty Making Decisions
Inability to Concentrate
Chronic Fatigue
Teeth Grinding
OCD
Social and Economical
Adverse Effects
Loss of Career & Finances
Loss of home & shelter
Damaged Reputation
(online and in life)
Loss of Friends & Family
"Psychological abuse involves trauma to the victim caused by verbal abuse, acts, threats of acts, or coercive tactics. Perpetrators use psychological abuse to control, terrorize, and denigrate their victims."
NCADV
"My narcissist's family called my job and lied to my boss to get me fired. It worked." -Survivor
Phases of Narcissistic Abuse
The phases of narcissistic abuse are across the board, textbook. A faux fairytale from the beginning, the narcissist targets and lures an unsuspecting empath as a source of narcissistic supply. The grateful empath cannot believe how lucky they are to have met such a wonderful and perfect match. Someone with whom the empath can share not only dreams, but fears and past traumas, all of which will be used against them in the future.
Idealization
(Lovebombing)
Over the top attention, showering with gifts, fairy-tale like, adoption of your interests & hobbies, rushed intimacy (asking you to move in, marry).
All designed to control you by overwhelming you with "love."
Devaluation
Critical remarks, even of things they "loved" about you in the beginning, intended
to degrade, demoralize,
frighten, & intimidate. Coercive Control.
Blameshifting, flipping conversations, denying your observations,
labeling you crazy.
Behind the scenes: cheating, triangulation, building a smear campaign, recruiting "flying monkeys."
Discard
Calculated rejection without warning, usually when you are at your weakest emotionally, mentally, & financially. The smear campaign convinced outsiders that you are crazy, aggressive, abusing substances; falsely depicting you as the abuser.
Defamation of character, libel, public humiliation.
For more detailed information on the phases of narcissistic abuse, visit any of our Resources.